I live in the Hamptons year-round, and I understand why people think summer here looks glamorous from the outside.
There is the much-anticipated season for those who come to visit: the rush of crowds, people jumping from one boutique fitness class to the next, the packed restaurants and bars, the private parties, and the highly coveted events all around.
But for me, as a single mom of two and the founder and owner of East End Taste, an event planning and production company, summer out east can be extraordinarily challenging. But I grew up in The Hamptons and want to raise my children here.
Housing costs are high
When I got divorced, I liquidated a great deal of my savings. I would not have been able to afford the divorce process otherwise. I am still pushing on from that deficit, and I have to work nearly four to five times as hard just to keep everything moving.
That means my Hamptons rent is a struggle. I pay around $4,000 a month, including utilities, basic maintenance, and house cleaning.
But the cost of renting a home here doesn’t stop at rent. Lawn care, air conditioning, pool maintenance, and basic upkeep add up quickly. Pool maintenance alone can cost $3,000 to $5,000 or more. I remember this from when my husband and I took care of his family’s property, and we were not even paying rent.
For pool maintenance during the summer months, I currently pay about $1,000 a month combined for air conditioning maintenance and pool cleaning.
Feeding my family can get difficult
Groceries in the Hamptons are extraordinarily overpriced. I am not even talking about some of the specialty markets like the famous Round Swamp Farm in East Hampton or Loaves & Fishes, where two items can easily be $40.
Costco, Lidl, and Walmart runs are necessary for my family. Most of my necessary shopping is in Riverhead or Hampton Bays, where the cheaper grocery stores are located.
For my kids’ lunches, I team up with a few other moms and pay one of them to make food for my kids for the week. I am so busy running around for my job that I feel like I am constantly either driving, stuck in traffic, on my computer drafting emails, or reviewing contracts. Having that help with lunches is one less thing I have to worry about.
I have also had to rethink my children’s activities
I cut out private tennis lessons and instead enlisted buddies who are more senior players to play with my kids.
My son organizes soccer sessions at the park, even with children he has just met. I love seeing that because they are learning how to stay active and create their own fun without every activity having to come with a major price tag.
I have also become savvy with checking out all of the public libraries in the Hamptons. Each one is different. I take my children there to participate in summer reading challenges and other programs. I am grateful for affordable classes and community offerings, like Italian in Bridgehampton and t’ai chi in Hampton Bays.
I do not allow my kids to go to the toy store or Dylan’s Candy Bar as liberally as I once did. I tell them, “If it is not in your piggy bank, you cannot afford it.”
My daughter has made homemade slime, lemonade, and iced tea to sell in our neighborhood so she and her brother can make extra cash to buy toys.
My social life is a financial struggle, too
I rarely purchase alcohol. Going out to eat for a party of four in the Hamptons can easily be well over $1,000 if everyone has dinner and two drinks.
I have become savvy with learning about happy hours, and I have no shame in asking whether a local’s rate is available.
I am also grateful for complimentary fitness classes around the Hamptons, typically sponsored by a brand. There are still ways to participate without spending a fortune, but you have to know where to look.
Living in the Hamptons year-round means seeing both sides of it
There is the glamorous version people come here for in the summer, and then there is the reality for locals, single parents, and small business owners trying to make it all work.
I love where I live and where I grew up. But summer here is not always easy behind the scenes.
For me, it takes discipline, creativity, help from friends, and a constant willingness to adapt and be humble.